Things I Have To Keep Telling Stan ‘the cat’ Lee
Get off of my head, Stan!
I’m allowed to look out the window, Stan!
You already have food, Stan!
Stop staring at me, Stan!
My bra isn’t your bed, Stan!
I didn’t ask for your opinion, Stan!
Stop stealing my seat, Stan!
I’m on the computer, Stan!
You can’t force me to pet you, Stan!
Claws are made for helping, not hurting, Stan!
(knocking me down while he runs into the other room) It’s just the doorbell, Stan! Nice to see you being so brave.
Stop stalking me, Stan!
No one wants to see that, Stan.
“Insert cat’s name who’s sitting on top of the cat tree that Stan jumps on top of’ is already sitting there, Stan!
My hair isn’t yarn, Stan.
No one likes a tattletale, Stan.
That’s not a real thing, Stan!
That joke isn’t funny, Stan!
The beanbag chair is not a litter box, Stan!
Your story is full of holes, Stan!
You’re the reason cat’s can’t vote, Stan!
Stop being weird, Stan!